14 Months

Dear Tree Faerie,

I apologize for not writing you a letter last month. Since you started walking, I’ve had to spend a lot more time keeping you out of things. Now you’re practically a pro!

In January, you got to go to Grams and Papaw’s house for the first time, and you had a great time! You slept the whole way down there in your new car seat. You played with all the dog toys, and Grams got to feed you in the make-shift high chair. We were there for Grams’ 50th birthday, so we took her out to eat crab legs per her request. You didn’t want to eat much of anything, but you enjoyed making a mess with crackers and Jell-O. Grams and Papaw also finished your Rocking Harley, which you now request to ride.

Before going to Grams and Papaw’s, you caught RSV again, although this time we didn’t have to rush off to the hospital. Instead you spent several nights sleeping upright in your old infant car seat. The congestion continued to hang around for a while, and just as it was clearing up you developed an ear infection that would not go away. We went through two rounds of antibiotics, and not only did the antibiotics not work, but your other ear got infected in the mean time! Your doctor referred us to an ENT doctor who was really nice and gave you tubes for your 14 month birthday. I was so nervous, partially because it would be your first time under general anesthesia and partially because I couldn’t nurse you after midnight the night before. Just like clockwork, you woke up at 2AM to nurse and could not understand why I wasn’t giving it to you. Your daddy got up and took us for a ride to get you to go to sleep, which worked like a charm. The morning of the surgery, I had to keep you distracted from the idea of nursing until after the surgery.

The surgery went fine. You were only away from me for 15 minutes total. When they brought me back to you in recovery, you were very, very, very unhappy. Once you realized you could nurse, you were a little happier but not much. As soon as we got you home, I put you down for a nap, and once you slept off the effects of the anesthesia, you were actually happy! Since the surgery, your balance has improved greatly so you don’t fall down nearly so much. You’ve also started mimicking words more often. The ENT doctor told us that your speech would improve after the tubes were in because you’d be able to hear better, but I really wasn’t expecting much. After all, you’re only 14 months old!

Speaking of talking, I’m going to have to teach you more signs, which means I have to learn more signs. You know “done,” “more,” “bye-bye,” and “nurse.” When you get frustrated trying to convey something, you go through all the signs you know over and over again. I can definitely understand that you want and need an effective way to communicate.

Of course, just because you can communicate your wants does not necessarily mean you’re going to get whatever it is you’re asking for. Another thing you’re working on mastering is the art of fit-throwing. When you throw a tantrum, I make sure you’re not going to hurt yourself, and then I walk away and let you scream. I’m sorry that one of the life-lessons you must learn is that you can’t have everything you want, but the sooner you learn it, the happier we will all be.

Sometimes it is a very good thing you are so darn cute, because otherwise we might actually consider returning you. You and I have had a few battles, sometimes involving hair-pulling, but I know that this is simply your way of learning how the world works. You constantly test your boundaries and our limits.

You finally cut your third tooth, although it was not either of the upper front teeth. You cut the tooth just to the right of the upper front teeth. You are working on teeth #4, 5, and 6, and you are not happy about it. I keep hoping they will go ahead and break through, but alas, they are being stubborn. People have offered all kinds of suggestions to help you out, from giving you chicken bones to gnaw on to hanging an egg in a sock over the bedroom door. I haven’t tried either of these. I have given you metal spoons, teething rings, and pieces of ice in either a washcloth or a mesh chew-thing to chew on.

Thank you for making me a better person. I am very proud to be your mother. Everyone loves you, and you know it. You even amp up the cuteness when you think it may help you get your way. You’ve given us so many hugs, kisses, and snuggles. I wouldn’t miss any of them for the world. I love you, Tree Faerie. As always, I look forward to what the coming weeks will bring.

Hugs and Kisses,

=|= Mama

Tubes Are In

Well, the tubes are in and Tree Faerie is doing fine. She was only away from us for 15 minutes, and while it was the longest 15 minutes of my life, we made it. She was an unhappy camper until she got to come home and take a nap. We were home by 10AM, and I had her down for a nap by 10:30. She slept for two solid hours, after which she was happy and fun.

We also handled not being able to nurse after midnight okay. Not great, but okay. At 2AM she woke up and couldn't understand why I wasn't letting her nurse. Since Tree Faerie chose to express her displeasure by screaming at the top of her lungs, DTTF got up and suggested we take her for a drive. He drove us around for about an hour and showed me one of the places he used to live. When she finally fell asleep after 40 minutes, all of which were peaceful, I was a little afraid I wouldn't be able to get her in the house and in bed without her waking up. Thankfully there were no complications, and she slept until DTTF's alarm went off at 6:20. I managed to keep her distracted from nursing most of the morning. All in all, it wasn't too terrible.

I've already noticed an improvement in Tree Faerie's balance. She hasn't fallen nearly so often since the tubes were put in. We'll see if there are any rapid changes in her speech...

Thanks for the support and encouragement.

Hopefully I'll actually get around to writing Tree Faerie's 14 month letter tomorrow. She didn't get one last month.

Still Wins My Heart

While Nursing Tree Faerie down for a nap, she was trying hard to resist sleep. One of her favorite self-distraction techniques is to play with my hair. Because the tickling on my face was getting annoying, I turned my head so she could play with the hair away from my face.

Apparently she wanted my attention and affection, because after a moment she stopped nursing, pulled herself up to my face, and planted a big wet kiss on my face. I gave her a kiss and a hug and told her I loved her, and she snuggled back down to continue nursing.

(I hear the chorus of "Awwww!!!" out there. That's what I said, too!)

How could anyone resist the cuteness that is my child? *sigh*

Fickle Friday

This won't be a long post, but I wanted to keep you wonderful ladies updated. Tree Faerie had her doctor's appointment this morning, and now we have an appointment with an Ear, Nose, and Throat (ENT) doctor on Monday.

Oddly, it's not because her right ear is still infected. It is because her left one is now infected! I wasn't treating that ear with the ear oil (which, by the way, is why I think the right ear looks so much better, though the doctor doesn't think so).

So, now I'm treating the left one, too.

Oh, and I'm home with her today because she keeps throwing up. She started last night around 11 PM. I had hoped to drop her off at daycare this morning after the doctor's appointment, but she decided to spew again on the way. Now my car smells like half-digested breast milk. Of course, right now that's how everything smells to me.

Next week is a new week and will be much better, right?

Saturday's Story

I just wrote this long, beautiful post about Saturday's adventures, and Blogger ATE IT! That SUCKS!

So, you only get the short version while I try to resist kicking, screaming, and throwing things. I wanted to go see Cloverfield, but then I remembered DTTF telling me that people were being warned about motion sickness, which meant that we had to wait for the movie to come out on DVD. I get motion sickness from playing or watching others play video games sometimes, so that option was out.

On to Plan B - Barnes & Noble. I knew I had to eat first, but the prospect of eating alone was kind of depressing. I first called my friend I'd had to cancel with earlier in the week due to being sick, but I only got her voicemail. I started scrolling through the phone to find someone else and was surprised by how many people I either was not in the mood to talk to, knew they had plans, or they lived too far away. One name kept popping out at me, so I dialed the number.

Turns out she was free, so we met at a great steak place after I dropped Tree Faerie off. We had melt-in-you-mouth-it-was-so-delicious steak and wonderful conversations. After dinner, we headed over to Barnes & Noble for over-priced-but-nice-for-a-treat coffee and an abundance of books. The great conversations continued. Before B&N closed, I purchased Stephen King's new book, Duma Key. The evening was wonderful and couldn't have been planned better.

I picked up Tree Faerie and had her home and back in bed by midnight. I still hadn't received a call from DTTF, so I called and left him a message telling him goodnight. I then picked up our new book and started devouring it. I went to bed around 1AM.

As soon as DTTF had a signal on his phone on his way home Sunday, he called ant talked to me until he pulled into the driveway. Tree Faerie was napping, so we ate lunch and he made a few phone calls. He was still on the phone when Tree Faerie finally awoke. As soon as she heard his voice, she sat up and said, "Dada?" I took her into the bedroom where DTTF was sitting with his back to the door. The moment she saw him she wanted down, so I set her on her feet. She toddled over to him and made it very clear that she had missed him and was very happy to see him. He quickly got off the phone so he could snuggle with his child.

We survived our first weekend with DTTF gone. Hopefully there won't be too many of those, though, because I really enjoy having my partner right next to me!

Happy Valentine's Day!

The Return of Aunt Flo

Due to breastfeeding and my wonderful Progesterone-Only-Pill (known as a POP), my monthly cycles did not start up again after Tree Faerie's birth. In essence, I have not had a cycle since April 7th, 2006. Of course, that is not including the shedding of the lochia, because I don't consider that a cycle.

Taking the amoxicillin has kick-started a menstral cycle because it negates the POP. Thankfully this cycle is nowhere near the cycles I had prior to getting pregnant. The cramps have been mild, the moodswings have been mild, and overall I feel pretty good. I even cleaned off my desk yesterday!

Cleaning off my desk is a really big deal. Apparently, I've been nesting for the last two years. I had surrounded myself with piles of paperwork, some of which needed to be filed, some needed to be shredded, and some just needed to be thrown away. When I stopped pumping at the beginning of the year, I wanted to get myself a treat for pumping for a full year. My desk was so overflowing, though, that I told myself I couldn't get my treat until after I cleaned off my desk. It took the return of Aunt Flo to give me the motivation to clean off my desk. I had several people stop me and ask if I was planning to return from lunch.

After picking up Tree Faerie from daycare yesterday, we immediately headed over to the pet store to pick up feeder fish for Creature, the garter snake we are currently housing, and my treat. This is what my treat looks like:


This is not my actual fish because I don't have my camera with me. I named him Hank after Henry Rollins, who's birthday is tomorrow. DTTF is a huge fan of dear old Hank, and he got me hooked several years ago. I got to meet him a couple of years ago, and even had him sign a dollar bill.

So, now I have a betta fish on my desk in a green-based aquarium. The hum of the filter is going to take a little while to get used to, but Hank the Fish is adapting very well to his new home. He dislodged the plants, though, so they're floating at the top of the tank. I think I'm going to get some decorative gravel instead of just the brown stuff, and I'll fix the plants when I put in the new gravel.

Solitary Saturday

While Tree Faerie and I are both feeling much better, we really miss DTTF. Or at least I do. All Tree Faerie has wanted to do all day is nurse and sleep. What really sucks is that I can't just call him up.

Well, I could, but I'd probably just get his voicemail, or on the off-chance that he actually does have a signal out there, I don't want to interrupt anything. When he has to work on Saturdays, I miss him, but I know I'll see him in just a few hours. I won't see DTTF until tomorrow! It seems like forever away.

I haven't heard back from my friend I was trying to make plans with, so I guess I'm flying solo tonight for Parents Night Out. I'm actually pondering going to a movie all by myself, something I've NEVER done. Then again, I may just go ahead and go to Barnes and Noble. Another option is to wait until another friend of mine should be awake and call her to see what she's doing before work. She works 3rd shift, so I know she'll be up and probably be free beforehand. Hmmm. Decisions, decisions.

DTTF asked me why they scheduled two PNOs so close together. I pointed out that the daycare probably thought they'd be nice and offer one close to Valentine's Day to give parents a chance for a romantic dinner. While I don't really NEED a romantic dinner, this thought definitely makes me miss DTTF more.

And before you point it out, yes, I'm fully aware that I'm a co-dependent person. I've come a long way, but I will freely admit that I depend on DTTF for a lot of things.

Like tackling the playpen when I can't get it to work right... I woke up this morning to a very, very dirty child who had a very, very dirty bed. After I cleaned up the child, rinsed all the bedding, and started the washer, I dismantled her bed, took it outside, washed it off, and sprayed it with Lysol. I left it sitting in the sun to freshen up and dry. What sucks is that when I set the bed back up outside, I apparently did it wrong, because only one side clicks into place but I can't get it to release now that it has clicked. I figured I'll go ahead and let it soak up some sun, and later this afternoon, Tree Faerie and I can go outside and wrestle with it. If all else fails, I can always have her sleep in my bed tonight. I just don't get much sleep that way. Surely I'll be able to fix it, though.

Okay, enough rambling. I think I hear the kiddo stirring.

Feeling Better...

...but not by much. I am back at work today and seem to be mostly fever-free. As long as I remember to keep taking the ibuprofen, I should make it okay.

Tree Faerie is still not sleeping at night. She's finally keeping the antibiotics down after the nurse suggested I give her a small dose of Mylanta with the antibiotics. She's still running a fever off and on, though. At first I just thought it was because of the ear infection. Now I'm wondering if she has the same thing I have. Maybe I gave it to her. She doesn't seem to have a bad cough, or at least not any worse than the one she's had off and on since Christmas. She keeps rubbing her forehead as if she has a headache, though, and she still wants to sleep a lot, at least as long as she's on me. Sadly, that is not conducive to my need for sleep. Thankfully I was able to take her to daycare yesterday so I could go home and sleep. I think that's the only reason I made it to work today.

Hopefully we'll both be better soon. DTTF has a minister's retreat this weekend, and this will be the first time he's gone to a retreat without me since we moved in together 6.5 years ago. I've been to a couple without him, though I missed the one I usually go to because I wasn't willing to take Tree Faerie with me OR leave her at home with him. She was only 3 months old at the time. This will definitely be a new experience. Daycare is offering another Parents Night Out tomorrow night, which I will be taking advantage of. Even if I just drop her off and go hang out at Barnes and Noble to drink coffee and extend my book wish-list, at least I will be out of the house doing something fun and kid-free. I used to feel guilty for doing anything kid-free, but I don't feel that way so much anymore. Now I see the need to take breaks so I don't get burned out, because I can't quit this job if I'm suffering from burn-out.

Tree Faerie's 13 month letter will have to wait until next week because I have to try to get caught up at work.

No Wandering Wednesday today.

I have one in the works, but I have to go pick up Tree Faerie from daycare because she hasn't stopped crying since I dropped her off. Hopefully I can get her to go to sleep and let me take a nap... I feel worse today than I did yesterday. And we aren't even going to discuss the catastrophe that was the doctor's appointment yesterday.

So, until tomorrow, hope you all start feeling better.

Trudging Tuesday

While it's nice to have suspicions confirmed, it is not nice to still have to deal with a sick child. Tree Faerie has an ear infection, just like I suspected. Sadly, she's also running a fever off and on. This morning at 3:30AM, her temperature was 102.2 degrees, and she was awake and delirious. She had a lot to say in a very sing-songy voice, which would have been absolutely adorable had it not been 3:30 in the freaking morning. The Motrin finally kicked in and broke her fever around 4:30.

Of course, then I couldn't sleep well. Since scheduling the appointment for my bladder infection, I have developed a terrible chest cold. If Tree Faerie had not demanded that I get out of bed this morning, I would have probably stayed there until my appointment this afternoon. I'm certain I'm running a fever despite the Advil I took this morning. Basically I just feel like crap and still have to pee every 15 minutes. I'm at work, though, at least until my appointment this afternoon.

Sorry for the whiney post, folks. Hopefully all will be better tomorrow for the second installment of Wandering Wednesday.

Doctor Visits Galore

We're starting this week off with doctor visits. Tree Faerie is exhibiting the symptoms of an ear infection again, and I seem to have a bladder infection. What a wonderful way to start the week, right? Tree Faerie's appointment is this afternoon, and mine is tomorrow.

This weekend, Tree Faerie went from walking like a drunken sailor to walking like a drunken sorority sister. She can walk in a fairly straight line and stay on her feet for a little while, but if she tries to do any fancy maneuvering or goes to fast, she falls down. She is almost up to a run, though. It's incredibly cute. I am often amazed by how quickly things change.

Tree Faerie is also starting to mimic words more and more. She doesn't use a lot of consonant sounds, but she has the vowels and the inflections down pretty well. I'm starting to understand her more. I wish I could be more consistent with using sign language. Having my hands full the majority of the time makes it difficult, though. Of course, my hands are full from holding Tree Faerie a lot. She certainly loves her Mama. I am considering picking up a signing DVD. There are varying opinions out there regarding how well the children pick up the signs from the DVDs, so I'm not sure how well it would work. I really think, based on the opinions and reviews I've read regarding the plethora of signing DVDs on the market, that the success of any particular DVD is based more on the child than anything else.

Do any of you have experience with the signing DVDs? Do you have a recommendation of one to try? Do you know of any that I need to steer clear of?

Last Night's Bath Time Adventure

***Warning: Not for those with weak stomachs! This post is definitely a TMI post, but hey - it's my blog. :) Read at your own risk! Seriously, it's gross.***

Recently I altered Tree Faerie's bedtime routine to include a bath every night, especially since she gets a little wild and crazy with her food. Since making this change, bedtime has actually been a little easier. Sometimes she is too fussy to make it through a story, but the bath and bed routine really helps mark it as bedtime.

Last night after dinner I got Tree Faerie in the bath. We were playing with her bath toys and flinging them off the side of the tub back into the bath water, when all of the sudden she takes a dump. Not a nice solid dump that could easily be scooped out. Oh, no. She had a loose one - with corn! I have to assume she had corn at daycare, because I didn't feed it to her!

My first thought was, "EW! GROSS!" My second thought was to scoop it out, so I grabbed a wipe and tried to capture some of it while trying not to gag. Um, no. Did I mention it was loose? Well, Tree Faerie thought that capturing it was a good idea, so she tried to catch some. More gagging ensued while I snatched her out of the tub, wiped her bottom with a wipe, and then quickly scrubbed her down with a clean wipe or two or three. I deposited her on the floor on top of her towel so I could figure out what to do next.

Besides gag.

Or puke.

I hit the drain for the tub but decided the drain plug thing might catch some of the feces, so I unscrewed it and set it on the side of the tub. I threw all the toys in the sink and turned the hot water on full blast. When the water had mostly drained out of the tub, I turned off the sink and turned on the shower head, which thankfully we have one of those hand-held ones. I rinsed everything out of the tub and then threw the toys back in the tub for more rinsing. And spraying of Lysol. And gagging.

All the while my child is sitting naked on the floor having a grand time pulling each and every wipe out of the container.

I swear I washed my hands over a dozen times, and every time I thought about it, I wanted to gag. I still want to gag a bit. And tonight I will probably scrub the tub before her bath.

So, if you actually made it through this tale, please, please tell me I'm not alone in this!

Mental Health Monday

Today I decided to stay home for a mental health day. I took Tree Faerie to daycare and came home, intending to cry a bit and clean. Instead I exercised, which was absolutely wonderful. I still haven't cleaned anything yet, but I feel much better.

This weekend we bought a couch and love seat. DTTF and I have always had futons for furniture. In fact, our bed is still technically a futon. We have been looking for an affordable yet nice couch and love seat set. The other day, DTTF found a used set on Craigslist, so we went to take a look.

I LOVE this set! It is dark red, a color I wouldn't have automatically gone for, but it's gorgeous! And soft! And snuggly! And it has already made it through the life of one toddler without permanent damage, so that gives me hope!

While we were trying to decide whether or not to buy the set, we went to Ashley Furniture to talk things out and see if buying a brand new set would be affordable. We found a couple of sets we really liked, but in the end we decided to go ahead and purchase the used one. Part of the reason for this decision is that if we bought it new and something happened to it before it was paid off, we'd be really upset. Buying the used one allows us to relax a bit, especially since we have a toddler and furniture-abusing friends (a story for another day).

The other thing that happened this weekend is DTTF finally put a piece of drywall over the hole in my closet. Yay! Hopefully soon I'll have my own closet back! I know DTTF is tired of Tree Faerie and me taking up space in his closet. While he was preparing the wall, I heard the quote of the weekend:

"No, baby, don't! You're rusting my tools!"

A Bully in the Making

Tree Faerie is cutting a new tooth - the front upper right tooth. There is an obvious bump on her gums, but the tooth hasn't quite broken through yet. She hasn't wanted to chew on anything cold this time, though, only cool, room temperature, or warm (like ME!). Once this tooth breaks through, that will give her a total of 3 teeth.

I am certainly not complaining, though, especially after the week we've had. Tree Faerie has bit my nipples multiple times, which is to be expected since I'm still nursing her. What wasn't expected was the hair-pulling and pinching she's started doing. The only thing more irritating than being pinched is having my hair pulled (all sexual comments aside). Nothing irritates me more than her grubby little hands reaching out and grabbing a handful of hair. I don't mind if she gently strokes my hair or lets it flow through her fingers, but when she grabs a handful and yanks, I really want to do terrible things! Instead I just scream, which she finds hilarious.

Wednesday night, however, I finally started fighting back. When she grabbed the first handful of hair, I pried her fingers open and told her to stop. The second time, she grabbed two fistfuls and hung on for dear life! So, I did what my mother told me to do - I pulled her hair! Needless to say, she wasn't too thrilled with her hair being pulled, which I didn't do very hard. She didn't let go of my hair, though, so I did it again. We got into a little hair-pulling battle for a few minutes, during which she sat on my face and farted, but she finally let go of my hair.

And proceeded to pinch and scratch me repeatedly.

By this point, the pinching didn't seem so bad. At least for the first minute and a half. I finally started pinching her back! I didn't pinch her hard enough to make a mark, but hard enough to let her know how annoying it felt. She finally stopped and we moved on to tickling and kisses.

I know Tree Faerie knows the meaning of the words No, Stop, Don't, and Gentle. Since she's choosing not to heed these words, she's now learning what the phrase, "If you don't stop, I'm going to do it to you and see how you like it!" I know I'm supposed to be the adult in this relationship, but sometimes you have to talk to them on their level, right?

Though if I ever wished to be one year old again, I don't think hair-pulling, pinching, scratching, and biting would be on my list of things-I-want-to-do-again.

Stretch Marks Study

When I got pregnant, I was not surprised when the stretch marks started to appear since I had gotten stretch marks at every growth spurt throughout my life, whether in height or width. I did a bit of research but lost hope when I kept reading that stretch marks were not preventable or treatable. I found a lot of ads for stretch mark creams. All of the “testimonials” raved about how wonderful these creams were, but I couldn’t find a third-party comparison or consumer review site for the creams.

I tried Palmers Cocoa Butter, but I was so sensitive to smells that I couldn’t even have the lotion out on the counter, much less use it. Thus, the only treatment I lathered upon my rapidly spreading stretch marks was an unscented off-brand Vitamin E lotion. I can’t tell if the lotion helped with the stretch marks, but it did relieve the itching. I now have stretch marks curving over my hips, around the front of my abdomen and down my thighs.

Diva over at Diva’s Skin Care Blog decided to put the stretch mark cream leaders to the test. She put four stretch mark creams to the test on 10 different people, some who were trying to prevent stretch marks and some who were trying to erase old stretch marks. Revitol Stretch Mark Cream came out on top, and she even posts photos of the participants who had the best results.

I wish this post came out a couple of years earlier when I could have used this information to help me decide which cream to use. I’m considering trying one of the products mentioned in her post to help diminish or erase my battle scars stretch marks. While they look better than they did a year ago, they’re still not pretty.

Uproar at Daycare

After I picked Tree Faerie up from daycare last Thursday, I noticed she had a huge knot and bruise on her forehead. I didn't notice this until we got to the grocery store, which is only about 5 minutes away from the daycare. While I know kids get bumps and bruises, the daycare has always been very good about providing an incident report. Based on the size and color of the bump, I figured I had just missed the incident report or that it was still in the main office and hadn't been returned to the teacher for me to sign.

Friday morning I inquired about it when I dropped Tree Faerie off. The head teacher, Ms. J, did not know what happened but mentioned that yesterday was a rough day. The normal assistant teacher was not in the classroom at the time, so I couldn't ask her. There was a "floater" teacher assisting Ms. J, however I didn't think anything of it because sometimes teachers need to take off. Since they were trying to get the kids seated for snack time (yes, at 9 AM), I didn't stick around to find out more information.

When I went to pick Tree Faerie up on Friday afternoon, Ms. J was still there, which is unusual. Usually the assistant teacher (or floater when the assistant is out) is the one there in the afternoon. Since there weren't many kids left and no other parents present, I asked if everything was okay in that magical way of mine that says, "Please, pour your heart out to me! I'm here to listen!"

Turns out the assistant teacher left for lunch on Thursday and decided not to return. According to Ms. J, the assistant teacher was unhappy there, but not with the kids or Ms. J. What is odd is when I dropped Tree Faerie off on Thursday morning, I asked the assistant teacher if she was okay because she looked upset. She said she didn't feel good, so I left it at that.

So, now they are looking for another assistant teacher for Tree Faerie's toddler room. Meanwhile, floaters and teachers from other classes are covering the toddler room. What makes MY life a bit more difficult is that the time I normally drop Tree Faerie off in the morning is the same time the head teacher is driving one of the buses. She's only gone for about 30 minutes, but I usually drop off in that 30 minute window. Every day this week, I've had to hand Tree Faerie off to someone she's not as familiar with, resulting in an upset child. It breaks my heart! This morning I almost went back in to get her!

Because she did the same thing when I left her with DTTF last week when she was sick, I know she is not upset for long after I leave. This knowledge does not make walking away any easier, though. I'm very thankful that I can also call and check on her during the day, which I just did, of course. She's fine, and since I actually got to talk to Ms. J, I feel much better. My heart still aches for her, but now it's a dull throb instead of a wrenching feeling.

*sigh* On with my day...

The Weekend My Mom Turned 50

Friday evening we were in no hurry to head out because I planned to leave around Tree Faerie's bedtime in hopes that she would sleep the whole way. I have to pat myself on the back for that one because it worked! She slept the whole way! I drove straight through without stopping because I didn't want to chance waking her up. Since my bladder wasn't yelling at me to pull over, we just decided to keep driving.

We got to my parents' house around 12:45 AM, and as expected, Tree Faerie woke as soon as we turned off the car. She was in a good mood, though, and wanted to play for a while. We visited for a little while and finally headed to bed around 3 AM. I know this only because while I was trying to nurse Tree Faerie to sleep, the clock chimed and did its little song. Thankfully it didn't wake her back up, but I was holding my breath just in case.

The next morning she decided 7 AM was a good time to get up. Mom made scrambled eggs with cheese and toast, which was Tree Faerie's first time trying scrambled eggs. She seemed to like them okay, and she really enjoyed throwing them in the floor. My parents have a little dog that did not mind her sharing breakfast.

After breakfast, Pop brought Tree Faerie's late birthday present in. They crafted a Rocking Harley for her! It's absolutely adorable! And PURPLE! I promise to post pictures soon.

We left DTTF there sleeping while Mom, Tree Faerie, and I went to the store. Since Tree Faerie fell asleep on the way, I sat in the parking lot and waited for Mom to pick up a few things. As I sat there watching people come and go, I realized that I could have a 10 year old child right now if I hadn't been so careful. I started adding it up and figured out that one of the girls from my graduating class now has a 15 year old. I'm really glad I waited as long as I did because I'm ready to enjoy being a mother without feeling like she's holding me back or like she's a burden.

After we got back, we had lunch and made cheese dip, and I swept and mopped Mom's kitchen floor for her. My Upward Bound friends showed up just as I finished, and they brought home-made strawberry cheesecake. We all visited for a while, and I must say I'm really glad kids start small and work their way up, because if I was just handed a 3- and a 5-year-old, I'd probably pull my hair out. But the kids were cute, and we had fun talking.

That night after Pop went to work, we took Mom to dinner at her favorite Chinese restaurant where they serve crab legs and shrimp. I quickly discovered my kid can really make a mess. Between the crackers, the fortune cookies, the chicken and then the jello, I practically had to bathe her with baby wipes.

Sunday morning, Tree Faerie got up with Mom and let Mom change her diaper and play with her for a while before waking me up, which was a perfect birthday present for "Grams". We had biscuits and gravy for breakfast, then we finished making the crescent rolls Mom started when she got up that morning. The crescent rolls were delicious!

When I asked Mom how it feels to be 50, she said, "Oh, about like 49." We discussed that it wasn't as bad as she thought it would be when she was my age, and that 30 was the hard birthday for her. My mom is a pretty amazing woman and has been through a lot. I really admire her in a lot of ways.

We headed back a couple of hours later than I had intended, but Tree Faerie decided to take a nap before we left, and Mom fell asleep, too. We got back to Memphis around 8 on Sunday night, and I only had to ride in the back seat for the last hour of the trip. Before Tree Faerie was born, I never even considered the possibility that I would be breastfeeding in the backseat of a car doing 80 mph down the interstate. And before you ask, yes, Tree Faerie was still buckled into her car seat. I was practicing my contortionist skills.

It was a wonderful weekend. While I'm sure we'll head down there several times over the next few years, I look forward to taking her down there sometime when she's older and telling her the stories from when I was growing up. I just hope she's interested in hearing the stories.

Back to Daycare

Since I had the doctor's permission for Tree Faerie to return to daycare, I got us both ready and took her up there. While I was signing her in, I discovered the daycare thought they had a Rotavirus outbreak, not RSV - Respiratory Syncytial Virus. I corrected her teachers, then talked to the assistant director. I just emailed them a fact sheet as discussed with the assistant director this morning.

I wonder how big of scare this miscommunication caused? Tree Faerie has all of her vaccinations up to date, which includes the inoculation for the Rotavirus. With more and more parents choosing not to vaccinate their children, at what point will an outbreak of a commonly vaccinated disease cause panic? I chose to have Tree Faerie vaccinated because I knew if she became very ill or worse from something I could have easily protected her from, I would not forgive myself. And because we have people immigrating from countries where vaccinations are not required, how can one be sure their child will not come into contact with that virus? We live in a world where a highly infectious disease could spread to all the major populated areas of the world within 3 days. It's kind of scary when you think about it.

I remember the first time I read The Stand by Stephen King. I couldn't decide which would be better - to be one of the few immune to the disease or to be one of the many to die quickly.

On to find happier thoughts...

Over the Hump

(What an appropriate title for Hump Day, right?)

Tree Faerie's RSV seems to be clearing up. She still has some rattling and wheezing, but she slept better last night, which means I slept better last night. Of course, DTTF fell asleep on the couch, so I put Tree Faerie in bed with me at midnight, put her back in her old car seat at 2AM, then back in bed with me at 4AM. She slept pretty well next to me. DTTF said he tried to come to bed but there was no room for him. Since I'd turned off the lights at 2AM while he was still crashed out on the couch, I know it had to be after 4AM when he tried to come to bed. Thankfully he enjoys sleeping on the couch, so I don't feel too bad about us taking up the entire bed.

Tree Faerie has been sleeping in her old infant car seat for the last few nights to help keep her more upright. She could breathe a lot easier when she wasn't laying down flat. When I tried putting her in her bed a couple of nights ago, she kept waking up coughing and choking. At least when she's in the car seat she can catch her breath during her coughing fits.

I took her back to the doctor this morning as scheduled to get clearance to return to daycare. She'll be going back tomorrow since she was still running a fever last night. I really appreciate DTTF taking the time off to stay with her. He's handled it beautifully, and this has given them plenty of bonding time. He really is a great daddy.

While we were at the doctor's office, Tree Faerie was practicing toddling in her shoes. She does most of her walking barefoot, and up until this morning she had not built up the confidence to try it in shoes. When we go to the doctor, I sit in the floor of the examination room while we're waiting so I can more easily field what Tree Faerie plays with. Toys and books are okay, but I don't want her tearing up the books or playing with the trashcan or its contents. This morning I was sitting in the middle of the floor while Tree Faerie checked out the room and rearranged the books. After a few minutes, she crawled over to me and used me to help her stand. When she let go, she stood there and gave me a look that seemed to say, "Do you think I can do this? I'm not so sure about these shoes..." I encouraged her and told her she could do it. She took a couple of shaky steps, then plopped down giggling. For the next 5 minutes or so, she would hold my finger while she walked to the end of my reach, then she would let go and toddle back to me, collapsing into a giggly hug.

This is just one more thing that convinces me I really do have a wonderful daughter. I've decided I'm really not in a hurry to have another. I do still want another, but I'm really enjoying this time with Tree Faerie.

I think our next adventure will be to break out the crayons Grams got her for Christmas. I just have to find my big drawing pad. I also have a plan for broken crayons now, because I know we're going to have broken crayons. I came across this post over at Peapod Squad Stuff about melting down the broken crayons in a muffin tin and love the idea! The woman has triplet toddlers she calls the Peapod Squad - Sweet, Snap, and Split. Their antics and dialog are absolutely adorable! And they have plenty of broken crayons, of course. I'm wondering if I could melt down crayons and pour them into chocolate candy molds to make cute shapes. I'll let you know if I try.

Relaxed and Prepared for New Stress...

...or not.

Saturday morning I indulged in a bit of pampering by getting a massage when I went to pick up the gift certificate for my mom's massage. Oh, my! I love this woman! A friend sent me to her for Mother's Day, and I decided then that I really needed to indulge about every six months. I'm running a little late, but I think it will be easier to get a massage in January and July instead of May and November. DTTF watched Tree Faerie while I was indulging, and she even took a nap for him! She snuggled on the couch with him and dozed off. He took pictures because he knew I'd be hesitant to believe that she was actually asleep.

The daycare provided us with a Parents Night Out on Saturday night. The last 3 times we had a PNO, we went to the movies and saw something action-packed and stressful. This time I decided I needed a social night, so we called up some friends and headed to the Flying Saucer. I feel just a little guilty for going to a beer emporium that houses over 200 different types of beer and only getting one type, Woodchuck Amber, but I don't really like beer. I tasted several different things, but every time I ordered, it was a Woodchuck Amber.

The drink was great, the food was good, and the conversations were great! I really needed to hang out with adults. We also played a game of darts, which I love and can usually win. DTTF won, though, because I let him win kept wracking up too many points.

When midnight finally approached, we headed to pick up Tree Faerie. The daycare was only about 3 minutes away from the Flying Saucer, and as we pulled up, I could see that I was one of the last parents to pick up. Turns out I was the LAST parent to pick up! Apparently I was the only one milking every minute I could.

The teacher told me Tree Faerie was running a fever of 100 degrees, not enough to warrant a call to me but enough to take note of and keep an eye on. I gave her Motrin before putting her to bed to make sure the fever didn't decide to skyrocket during the night. She had developed a cough on Thursday after getting a clean bill of health on Tuesday.

Yesterday her fever came back and stayed around 101. I didn't give her Motrin immediately because I believe that a fever is beneficial to a certain extend. I just tried to keep her as comfortable as possible. She kept coughing and her nose was running. She was pretty lethargic, and I knew she didn't feel well. After a rough night, I went ahead and called the doctor first thing this morning and got an appointment for 9AM.

Turns out she has RSV again. Last year she contracted RSV just after I returned to work from maternity leave. We spent the weekend in the hospital because she was under 3 months old, and then I had to keep her home for a week. This time I just have to keep her home for a few days. We will go back to the doctor Wednesday morning to check it, but if everything is better and she is fever-free, she should be able to go back to daycare on Thursday. DTTF is home with her today since I have no sick/vacation time left.

The good news is that the daycare director offered a 50% discount for the week since she'll be out for three days.

The other good news is that DTTF has called me twice already, and both times Tree Faerie was doing fine. I hope my baby feels better soon. Thankfully I was fairly well-rested and relaxed, so the sleep deprivation from only sleeping four hours last night isn't so bad.